I was reading through your comments regarding legitimate marriage for those who seek to follow our Lord... If a person makes a promise to the Lord, keeps that promise -- faithfulness to the "spouse," care of the family, etc -- must the union be recognized by the state to be valid before the Lord? Are we really on firm biblical ground in withholding baptism from a couple who want to become Christians but have not been legally married?... Now, there may be benefits to Christians desiring to be married having a state recognized marriage, but is it essential in God's eyes... Even if there are freedoms the scriptures give us regarding valid Christian marriages, if these freedoms leave families (especially women) open to abuse -- i.e. abandonment by a non-believer without accountability for children, etc -- it might be wise to advise believers to have a state/federally recognized marriage simply to protect those who might be hurt most by those who abuse their Christian freedoms. However, to withhold baptism because of what might be abused might border on going beyond what is written. -- Java Bradley
Well, your words are certainly thought provoking. The remaining question, however, would be "Who (on earth) determines when a couple is truly married?" On the one hand, the state does not have the right to define marriage. For instance, what if your government decides a man can "marry" a man -- would that then make such a relationship "legal" in God's eyes? Of course not. On the other hand, marriage is more than mere intent. Many religious persons rationalize their fornication by convincing themselves that they are "married in God's eyes." That, too, is patent nonsense. They have not made the public commitment. Marriage is not a private and secret affair; it has enormous social ramifications and as such has always been a very public institution.
Admittedly, sometimes the marriage discussion is plying some murky ethical waters, and you are right to raise the questions you do. I could add: Does the Bible ever tell us how to get married? No. Things are not always neatly defined. And yet while each situation may have to be decided on its own merits, case by case, this doesn't mean, in my view, that only God knows whether a couple is legitimately married. We can know.
This being the case, I for one would not hesitate to insist that a couple living in sin make the full, public, spiritual, and legal step of commitment in an authentic marriage before putting on Christ in baptism.
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